“I have written an article, to be sent to the Mandir for their annual magazine. Read it.” said Dad.

“Okay”, said I.

He reminded me twice again in the next 20 minutes.

Haan Papa, let me first finish making my calls.”

Somehow talking to my cousins and relatives and sharing our common grief seemed my priority. I wanted to “talk out” my grief.


Last November, I lost my cousin in a road accident. He was 32 years old. He left behind a young wife, a daughter – 3 years old, 3 sisters of whom one is unmarried. He was born in Kolkata and named Ramakrishna, after the great scholar, saint and philosopher Sri Ramakrishna Paramahamsa. My cousin was a gem of a person – a devoted son, a doting husband, father and brother.

This January 19th, I lost one of my aunts to cancer. Her beauty always awed me. It was her inner beauty, which reflected on her face and personality.

On January 25th, my maternal uncle too succumbed to cancer. I rushed to my hometown Bangalore to pay my last respects. What he was to me is difficult to describe in words.

All these people had beautiful hearts and wonderful souls. It was impossible for a person who came into contact with them, not to like them. So, why were they taken away when the world needs people like them? I was bereaved, still am…and was searching for the answer on that night.


welcome new light

I sat down to read the article only after I had dinner. I was mesmerized from the first word itself.

Dad’s article started with a prayer

Lead, kindly Light, amid the encircling gloom,
Lead Thou me on;
The night is dark, and I am far from home;
Lead Thou me on:
Keep Thou my feet; I do not ask to see
The distant scene, – one step enough for me.” …

(The first part of the hymn written by Cardinal Newman.)

In the article, Dad had written how this prayer was transformed into reality, when he actually was led by a light when he was in a difficult situation.

Many a time, when in grief or when we are sad, we are so preoccupied with our thoughts that we do not seem to notice the Universe sending us messages. We are searching for answers and may fail to see them right in front of us.

I read this prayer over and over. Every time I read it, I was filled with peace. I could understand and grasp the meaning. If not an answer, I had found solace in this prayer.

Thanks Dad.

~ Janaki

Janaki Nagaraj is a homemaker by choice and a blogger by passion.  Here’s what she has to say about herself: I’m a fun loving person who stopped growing at adolescence! 😉 My kids are my vitamin D, my friends are my strength and inspiration, my husband is my support.   Janaki writes at http://www.janakinagaraj.com and shares her love for photography at https://janakinagaraj.wordpress.com/