Francesca @ Etsy

I just came across this and would like to amend it to read : Home is not (necessarily) where you live but where they understand you.

It’s strange that I was thinking these thoughts yesterday and came across this picture today. So may be it was a ‘sign’ for me to write about it?

I’ve been thinking of  relationships that were the most significant to me a few years ago.  I rated these people very high on my list of relationships and gave them a lot of myself – time, energy and emotional support. I now realize that they never quite got who I am. I meet some of them now, some I don’t have anything to do with any more and wonder why I hadn’t realized this truth before. How did I allow myself to give so much and not know that I was not understood? Could it be that I so confused by who I was that I didn’t allow them to see the real me? Or is that they just never got me, never will and don’t care to?  I think it’s a little of both. Perhaps who I am makes them uncomfortable? I don’t know.

Am I angry with these people for not ‘getting’ me? No, but I do feel hurt. I do feel used to some extent. Perhaps if I had realized this earlier, I would not have spent so much emotional energy in defending them or in fighting their causes. But I didn’t realize and that’s done. No regrets. Only lessons.

What are the lessons?

To value myself and be myself with everyone,

To better understand the dynamics of the relationships I give my energy to.

However, this realization also made me ask myself if other people felt similarly misunderstood by me.  An important lesson for me is to make sure that I am taking the time and effort to understand people I am relating to.

As I’m writing this, I’m reminded of the prayer of St Francis of Assisi: Oh Master, grant that I may never seek …to be understood, as to understand.

What are your thoughts on the importance of  being understood and understanding in your relationships?

May you be inspired – every day!