It’s been over a month since I’ve written here and this Word of the Year update for August is really overdue. Life hasn’t been easy in the last few months, and I’m tempted to skip writing this post, but I’m committed to a monthly review – so here it is! I had chosen the them of Healing Through Routine for August. But things just didn’t go according to plan. On reviewing the month I realized August 2023 was a time for Healing and Breaking.
Healing And Breaking
August is normally a special month for me. It’s my birthday month and I love celebrating my birthday in small and meaningful ways. But this year, my birthday brought back a lot of unpleasant memories of the past.
Having been on a focused path of healing this year, I was caught unawares by this flood of memories when they hit me. What’s more, as I tried to delve into these feelings, I started to recall things that I thought I had dealt with!
This experience was humbling and let me feeling broken and vulnerable. Rather, than dealing with this, I found myself wanting to run away from these thoughts. Trying to rationalize them, I wondered why I allowed these memories to matter at all!
Rather than sticking to routine, I found ways to break out of it. My Morning Rituals, especially, writing Morning Pages, took a hit.
It was only as August ended, did I come to terms with how I was feeling. I realized that these feelings of brokenness were a gift – a reminder of how far along my healing journey I really was. I began to allow myself to delve deeper into my past experiences.
I came to the realization that much of my hurt was caused from my attempts to fit in with and belong to my family, my friends and significant others. This has changed. I no longer try so hard to be accepted and loved.
If you are healing and breaking all at once, do not fear. This is growth.
– Q Gibson
Opening myself up to healing without fear, is growth. Owning my brokeness is progress. I’m grateful for what I learned about myself in August.
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Corrine you were certainly missed. I admire your strength to push pass your pain and do what you’re so very committed to do.
Keep on pushing!
Pauline Mansfield
A Big Fan!
Thank you for your love and support, always, Pauline.
A blessed birthday, Corinne…though belatedly! Blessed are the broken for they shall be made whole. I wish you wholeness of spirit. Shalom!
Thank you, AJ. Yes, I cling to that promise because I know it to be true!
I often think that if we lived close, I’d love to meet up with you, Corinne, and have a nice long chat about our backstories. I don’t know the exact pains you’re dealing with, but I’m glad to see you have compassion for yourself once you came to terms with how you were feeling. The past two years have rocked me to my core; my emotions have run deep. I’m not through it yet, but I know that I need to give myself all the grace I can so I can eventually heal.
I’d love that too, Lisa. Maybe someday!
I watch how you find the grace to work through your pain, and stay committed to reaching out to people through your writing and in other ways. I’ve realized that healing is an ongoing journey and one we must allow ourselves to be led through.
Stay blessed!