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Can I Be Judge Judy For A Day #MondayMusings

Have you ever watched Judge Judy in action? If you haven’t,  you must. It’s a TV reality show in which the Judge rules on small claim disputes and arbitration matters.

judge judy
What I love about Judge Judy is that her bull**** meter is set to ‘0’! That pretty much is the number mine is reaching too. Unfortunately, it’s considered rude to tell people that that their words and actions are a load of c***. Also, most people are not really ready to hear that, are they?

So I ask:

Can I Be Judge Judy For A Day?

Here are some examples of situations in my life and how I’d like to respond using a Judy-ism. 

  • To the neighbour who ‘borrowed’ soil from our housing colony’s garden and then abused the conservancy staff for objecting, telling them that they didn’t know who he was, I want to say : ” You ought to be ashamed of yourself !”
  • To the person who pretends that her deceased father was a saint, when I have witnessed how his actions affected her life and marriage and how in the final days of her father’s life she all but abandoned him, I want to say: “If it doesn’t make sense, it’s not true.”
  • To that vain person who is always wondering about what people will think of her appearance, I want to say: “My grandmother always told me; beauty fades, but dumb is forever.”
  • To the relative who visits my brother next door, but says that he doesn’t want to visit us because he might disturb us, I want to say: “Don’t pee on my leg and tell me it’s raining.”
  • To the person who is always causing trouble by reporting different versions of the same story to different people, I want to say: “I think you ought to be quiet. You know, they don’t need anybody stirring up the pot. You’re a pot-stirrer.”

I would also love to use some of these Judy-isms soon:

“I’m here because I’m smart, not because I’m young and gorgeous…. although I am!”
“…I eat morons like you for breakfast. You’re gonna be crying before this is over.”
“I don’t care what you think! I’M the one who has to make a determination
what is fair.”
“Do you know when a gift becomes a loan? When the relationship is over. Have you ever heard that, sir? Well, neither have I. I just made it up. I’m going to put it on coffee mugs.”
“On your BEST day you’re not as smart as I am on my worst day”
“Ay! QUIET!”
“If you live to be a hundred you will never be as smart as me”

Are there situations and people in your life that move you to feel like playing Judge Judy? 😉

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26 Comments

  1. Devin Devin January 9, 2016

    LOL, I had a good chuckle over this article. I’m going to use some of the quotes like, “If you live to be a hundred you will never be as smart as me”

  2. Mahathi Ramya Mahathi Ramya January 6, 2016

    Nice responses in Judy’s style 🙂 Enjoyed the post. I wish you a very Happy new year Corinne 🙂

  3. Vinitha Vinitha January 6, 2016

    This was so good, Corinne. Made me laugh! 🙂 I have watched Judge Judy show a few times. She always makes sense to me. And yeah, you would make a very good Judy, Corinne. 🙂

  4. Wendy Tomlinson Wendy Tomlinson January 6, 2016

    Oh wouldn’t it be nice. I have a friend who really seems to go through life without monitoring what comes out of his mouth. Fortunately, he has a charm that seems to carry him through. I sometimes think the world would be a better place if we were more like Judy. Happy New Year

  5. Laurie Laurie January 6, 2016

    I’ve never watched Judge Judy, but agree. How refreshing to say what’s on your mind rather than stew in silence.

  6. Cranky Cranky January 4, 2016

    Oh O, 4 o’clock, gotta be Judge Judy…definitely Judge Judy…o boy, gotta be Judge Judy.

    And if it doesn’t make sense it is not true!

  7. Roxanne Jones Roxanne Jones January 4, 2016

    Love this, Corinne! And I think you’re being WAY too polite in some of your responses (I know, it’s a daytime TV audience, but pretend it’s cable instead and let ‘er rip!). Some asshats won’t get it otherwise…

  8. Haralee Haralee January 4, 2016

    This made me laugh! Who wouldn’t want to be Judge Judy for a day! That could be a new show.

    • Corinne Rodrigues Corinne Rodrigues Post author | January 4, 2016

      Wouldn’t it make a fab show if we all took turns? 🙂

  9. Anamika Agnihotri Anamika Agnihotri January 4, 2016

    I never knew about this series Judge Judy but now it appears, after reading your post, it must be very entertaining. In real life, I would want to become Judge Judy to people who always ask me “You don’t speak?” or tell me “You don’t speak” but seriously speaking, I don’t know what to tell them. Any suggestions?

    • Corinne Rodrigues Corinne Rodrigues Post author | January 4, 2016

      Don your Judge robes and tell them you can speak, but don’t want to waste your breath on them! 😉 Ha ha…frankly, I’d just smile and not bother to answer them!

  10. anks anks January 4, 2016

    Have never heard of the series but going by your post, I can bet it is highly entertaining! I don’t think I can ever be like her… forget being, I can’t even think like her!

    • Corinne Rodrigues Corinne Rodrigues Post author | January 4, 2016

      It is, Ankita. I’ve got all the Judge Judy makings – getting better with age! 😉

  11. bellybytes bellybytes January 4, 2016

    Ok. So that’s where “MondayMusings is going to be – Everydaygyaan. I love the new badge and hope to download it onto my web site. Can’t wait to post the first post.

    • Corinne Rodrigues Corinne Rodrigues Post author | January 4, 2016

      Yes, Sunita. Thanks for the feedback on the badge. I’m off to read your post.

  12. Debbie D. Debbie D. January 4, 2016

    Love it, Corinne! 😀 I can just picture you in judicial robes.

    Actually, Judge Judy reminds me of my mother and I have some of those traits as well.

    • Corinne Rodrigues Corinne Rodrigues Post author | January 4, 2016

      Ha, ha! I can imagine you too in that robe, Debbie! Nice to have you back.

  13. Kala Ravi Kala Ravi January 4, 2016

    Judge Corinne you rock! Yes tell ’em! It would feel really good to let off all the steam cooped in! I liked the idea of printing mugs with some of the chosen words, might just do that, and gift it to the ones who deserve to hear it! Adding ‘Awaaz neeche’ to your setof Judyisms!

    • Corinne Rodrigues Corinne Rodrigues Post author | January 4, 2016

      Ah, so you actually think it’s okay, Kala? You’re a girl after my heart! 😉

  14. Angel Stew & Devil's Brew Angel Stew & Devil's Brew January 4, 2016

    OMGOSH!!!!!!!!!!!!! I loooooooovvvvvve Judge Judy Corinne! And I LOVE this post!!!!! Hahahahahahaha! I have used Judge Judyisms right to the faces of the morons acting like, well, morons.. Hahaha. Great post!

    • Corinne Rodrigues Corinne Rodrigues Post author | January 4, 2016

      You must have a list of your own Karen-isms, my dear! I love the way you tell it like it is! 🙂

  15. richa singh richa singh January 4, 2016

    I am going to be judge Judy for a day at least! Perhaps more if need be 😀

  16. Shalini Shalini January 4, 2016

    I can’t stop giggling! I wish I could be Judy for a day. I will be pissing many people off. Awesome post, Corinne! 😀 😀 😀

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