Past experiences of people almost cutting me off and then suddenly connecting when they want something leave a poor taste in my mouth. By now, when someone connects out of the blue, I’m quite good at predicting why they are doing so.

Is Predicting Behaviour Bad?

A little confused about my predictions which are based on these people’s past behaviour, I wonder if my predictions make me judgemental. (Funny thing about the word judgemental is that it’s come to be a bad word. We often forget that it also means ‘the use of judgement’.) I also wonder if it’s okay not to help, when I know that I’m being used, only to be discarded. This, especially when their problems don’t come under the category of an emergency, a matter of livelihood or life and death.

Hmmm…tough one, no?

I ask myself, “What would happen if I don’t help persons like this?”

At worst, they’ll call me selfish. Do I care? No.

Then I come across this paragraph in Anthony D’Mello’s book ‘Awareness‘.

You can almost predict how this person is going to react. If I study a person, I can tell you just how he or she is going to react. With my therapy group, sometimes I write on a piece of paper that so-and-so is going to start the session and so-and-so will reply.

Do you think that’s bad? Well, don’t listen to people who say to you, “Forget yourself! Go out in love to others”.

Don’t listen to them! They’re all wrong. The worst thing you can do is forget yourself when you go out to others in the so called helping attitude.

For me that’s an affirmation that using my judgement to predict behaviour and not help such people is fine.

And here’s why I like Lucy better than Charlie Brown! ๐Ÿ˜‰

lucy make others happy

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Today’s linky can be found here below and my co-host is the inspiring ย Chocolate Loving Gal, Ashwini. She’s one of the bravest and sweetest Indian bloggers I know. More about her on my blog soon. ๐Ÿ™‚